“Doing nothing often leads to the very best of something.”
Winnie the Pooh
In Holland we have a term, ‘ONTHAASTEN’. It means to slow down, stop hurrying, let go of stress and relax. Many people use this term as a reason to take a break, holiday or retreat, to get away from ‘it all’. I moved to Thailand in 2001, at the age of 40. At that time I had a career as an educational consultant. I had the money, the house, the dream job. But no time to live, no time for happiness and a feeling of being unfulfilled. So, I moved to Thailand, met some wonderful people and started living the dream life I always wanted! Living in the tropics has changed and redefined my daily rhythm, the way I move and work. Most of the time it is just too hot or raining too hard - depending on the season - to be overdoing it and running and being busy, busy, busy. ‘Going with the flow’ became a necessary way of life. And a life that suited me well. I had never realised that I slowed down so much until I went to see my friends and family back in Holland one summer. People would tell me to hurry up, to get going, that I walked so slowly. I realised that living in the Western world is living in a world that is always moving at a fast pace. Running, never really stopping, late nights and long days, it wears you down. And that I had to move away from all that to slow down. How about you? Is it time to start ‘onthaasten’. …….and not just during a holiday or break for you too? I realise that we cannot all move to Thailand to slow down, so here are 3 tips to begin slowing down where you are now:
Have a look at your agenda. Busy? Full? Planned ahead for weeks? Make a new schedule, planning regular free time in your agenda. Top tip: block it out!!!! A white space is easily filled in with something! A friend of mine, who is a busy hairdresser, adds a Mrs. Brown in her daily schedule on a regular basis for 15 minutes. Mrs. Brown is her coffee break, which is something she really needs and enjoys! Recharge: plan your “Mrs. Brown” in your agenda too and really stick to it - it’s an important appointment. My agenda is simple: mornings are for work (computer work, meetings etc.) and afternoons are for me. Gardening, creative, see friends, have a meal in our restaurant, talk with the guests about anything, swim in the waterfall. Stuff like that. I do work 7 mornings a week (and yes: I do have a coffee break planned in), but I also have 7 free afternoons per week.
Enjoy your meals and coffee/tea breaks. Put your phone away. Try being present for the experience of your food. Really taste it. Notice and pay attention to the colour, the smell, the taste - how does it feel in your stomach? Don’t eat behind your desk! I will have my lunch after I finish my work in the morning. My stomach is my ‘alarm clock’ to stop working! I close down the office (which is in my home) and sit down with a lovely lunch, overlooking the valley and jungle that surround my house.
Say “NO” more often! How many times have you said yes (or ‘okay’ with a sigh) to a job or an outing that you really did not have time for, or wanted to do? That costs you energy and precious time that you needed for the chores you already had planned. Practice saying “NO” more often and stick to your planning. It is not easy to say “NO” at first. But, you will be amazed how quickly it becomes easy! It feels good to prioritise you. Learning to say ‘NO' was something I mastered in Holland already, and I do remember that I was flabbergasted the first time I said “NO” to somebody who wanted my help on the job. She just said: "Okay!" and walked away! I thought she would be angry or upset with me. She was not... Quite an eye opener!
So, small steps, try the 3 tips mentioned above!
Make time for yourself, enjoy the small things - recharge and take charge!
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